Does anyone have a gun handy?

Symptoms Of Hypothermia, ask my ass.

Why does living in a male dominated house have to be so frustrating? Do they not hear my requests... or are they ignoring me?

Me: "Could you all do me the courtesy of putting the toilet seat down after you're finished going to the bathroom?"

Husband: "I never leave the toilet seat up, it must have been one of the kids."

Son #1: "It wasn't me, I get blamed for everything, Dad was the last one in the bathroom!"

Son #2: "It must have been some drunk guy that broke into the house, cuz it WASN'T
me Mommy."


So with that, I retreat back to my normal duties, hoping they've retained something from the conversation. I really can't take any more surprises in the wee hours of the morning. My ass can't take it! I feel bad for my ass.. here I am stumbling out of bed at 2am, my eyes are so squinty you could blindfold me with dental floss. I finally find the bathroom, sort of like a blind person without a cane, and WHAMMO my poor ass is plunged into what feels like ice water.

Needless to say...

I had to take matters into my own hands.



With that problem solved it's on to the next.....

With wisdom comes saggy nuts.

Well.. I made it through my first day at winter school. It was completely unfuckingbearable! <---(I learned that from blognut, she's such a potty mouth) ;) The teachers were all very knowledgeable, had years of experience, and were so damn old I know their balls were bouncing off their knees when they walked. I was trying to pay close attention and be a good student, but my mind kept picturing these old, saggy, wrinkled, prune looking, balls swaying back and forth. I'll try harder tomorrow.....

Laid off and loving it!

As most of you know, my work is seasonal. As soon as the snow starts to melt and the birds start to sing their sweet, sweet, songs of spring.. I'll be back in full swing. Looking at hairy carpenter cracks, chewed up chunks of Vienna sausage stuck in unkempt beards, chins that bathe at the Copenhagen hotsprings, sweat rings that can reach unbelievable proportions, and the brilliant sparkle of four remaining teeth glinting at me in the morning sun. Ahhhh, those are the memories I hold close to my heart.. I'm getting all choked up just thinking about it. God I miss those guys!









But anyway... this has got me to thinking about how I seem to change whenever I'm laid off. The first thing I noticed is how my appearance changes. When I'm working, I always keep myself looking top notch. Why.. you ask? Considering what I'm faced with on a day to day basis, my only reply to that would be, I'm a f*cking idiot. I guess in all honesty it's because I'm the type of person that doesn't like to go out in public looking all sloppy & grubby. But here's the kicker.. when I'm laid off I tend to look like a bag lady. Let's talk about my hair for instance.. when I take my dogs outside to pee, I see how the birds are looking at me. They're looking at my hair like they just spotted the best piece of real estate their beady little eyes ever did see! Listen birds! My head is not a nesting ground!!









Then there's the clothing I wear when I'm laid off. Nothing ever matches! Looking good isn't even a priority anymore. It's all about comfort from that point on. Take it from me, right now.. I AM COMFORTABLE! I'm dressed so comfortable that I probably scared the Verizon service technician that came to my house today. First of all, my damn husband was suppose to be home to deal with the guy so I didn't have to frighten an innocent man. But as I was getting ready to choke the chicken prepare baked chicken I realized I was out of Reynolds oven bags. So I had to send my hubby to the store.. If you saw the way I looked you'd understand why I didn't go myself. I did the supermarket a big favor by not showing up there. When customers are nauseated, food doesn't sell that well. As far as mentally scarring that Verizon guy, screw him, I didn't know him and he didn't know me. Plus, I didn't compromise my comfort level today.









My bedroom even changes when I'm laid off. It's not just a bedroom right now.. it's a habitat. I have snacks scattered about, some cups here and there for my beverages... don't look at me that way! I'm entitled to a late night smorgasbord while watching movies! What a sight I must be at bedtime, laying there with my mismatched, BUT COMFY clothes, munching on Doritos and sippin' on an ice cold rum & coke iced tea.










There's some bad news to this happy lil' thing I got going. I have to get up early for the next two days. My company is sending me to one of those boring refresher type courses... they call it winter school. The kind where you have drool coming out of your mouth after the first hour. I can't wait to hear about all the new developments in concrete, asphalt, and maybe ass crack technologies.










By the way, if you didn't get to participate in the blogging story, please do. The story is getting hot and heavy... I can't let Sam go that easy, I want to hear what happens next! I'll be keeping this link open til hell freezes over if I have to.

and by the way.. WTF is up with the text on all of my past posts.. it's really friggin' small now. Christ..

Blogging Story... Come one, Come all!!

It was a morning like any other morning as I sat down at my computer. I had just poured my first cup of coffee.. when suddenly there was a knock at the door. I felt quite irritated by this. After all, My hair was a mess, and I was still wearing those God awful pink panther jammies that I'd been given as a birthday gift over five years ago.

My CopyCat Post... Just cuz it was sooo damn funny!

One of my favorite bloggers... blognut, had one of the most hilarious posts tonight. It seems that it can be a fun little game to type in "your name" and the word "needs" in the Google search engine. The results are really funny! When I read blognut's results over at her "More Mindless Rambling" site.. I laughed my ass off and I had to do it myself!

Here are my results.......


Teresa needs to lay off the sauce
Directly under that title it said: Here's a better question...has Teresa EVER had a real job? And no, gold digger doesn't count! Teresa STAY OFF THE SAUCE! ...
(Geesh! They were a little hard on me don't you think? and NO that isn't a rum & coke behind my back!)



Teresa needs one more miracle to become a saint
(I need more than ONE! They don't know me very well.)



Teresa needs rhubarb and cement to make this happen
(All I can say is... WTF? I'm not even gonna touch that one.)


Teresa needs an Exorcist
(Ya know.. under severe stress my head does have a tendency to spin around.)


Teresa needs to know, has Jack ever gotten anywhere with a woman, and if so, to what base did he get? He almost went all the way with a girl, he says, ...
(I have a question, why do I need to know? And more importantly.. who the hell is Jack?)


Teresa needs a strait jacket
(I guess they do know me pretty well.)


Everyone in bloggerland ought to try this... I'd love to hear what Google has to say about you!! ;)

Insomniac... Yeah, that be me!

They make Tylenol PM for people that are too bat shit crazy for regular Tylenol. The first step is to admit you have a problem...



"Hi my name is Mrs. Gripe, and I am a NON-SLEEPER!"




Why have I been cursed with this problem? No matter what I do.. I never, ever, get a full nights sleep. I've tried numerous things, But NOTHING seems to work. I've done the "don't drink anything that contains caffeine" suggestion. Did it work.. you ask? NO! I deprived myself of caffeine and still ended up laying there counting the bedroom ceiling tiles. Plus.. any time someone would ask me a question, I ended up snapping at them and looking a lot like this......





I tried the "run yourself ragged" suggestion. I did to MYSELF what I used to have do to my children when they were toddlers. Keep myself busy, busy, busy, all day! Running here and there, trying to break myself down slowly so I'd have no choice but to be sleepy when the time came. I created a consistent bedtime, I read myself a bedtime story and when that failed I took myself out for a midnight drive. The midnight drive worked, but I realized it wasn't such a good idea when I nodded off for a moment only to be awakened by a pair of headlights coming straight for me....






Then there was this suggestion.. "Turn off ALL the lights so it's pitch black, NO T.V... the television is a distraction, you cant be watching T.V. because it will STIMULATE you too much." What the hell do they think I'm watching, Long Dong Silver?? I was against the no T.V. deal, but I was willing to try anything.
So I turn off the television, I shut out every light, and I settle myself into bed.
As I was laying there for two hours I realized something... Did you know that dead silence has a sound?????? It sounds a little like a high pitched ringing or buzzing! Was I hearing the ringing in my ears? Who the hell knows... All I know is that if you would have peeked through my bedroom window that night you would have seen this.......






Even after going through all that, I'm back to square one. I have to take 3 Tylenol PM tablets just to keep myself asleep until around 2:00 AM. Even this has its drawbacks. I noticed that after I take these tablets and they start to kick in, I suddenly get the munchies! What's up with that?? They don't warn you that if you take this medication you could end up gaining 50 lbs in a month or the dangers of chewing on your husbands leg while dreaming of a bucket of KFC.





I don't know what to do anymore. I guess I'll just have to deal with it. If anyone out there has any new suggestions... let me in on them. Otherwise my husband could end up with a wooden leg.

Someone help me! I need a good laugh!

I am soooooo stressed out right now, I'm a nervous wreck! Did you ever have one of those days.... before 10:AM????? That's what kind of day I'm having. Nothing is going right! Plus.. to add to my stress, I've had 4 calls today from various engineering firms wanting to discuss their companies. Wanting me to elaborate on all my schooling, projects that I've worked on, etc. etc. Now I'm nervous... I know what company I'll be working with this year, but did I make the right choice??
I've been running it through my head over and over. Most of the other companies would require that I work away... I have children, I can't be traipsing all over the countryside. By the time I was done talking to everyone I started to sound like this......






I have a bunch of crap going through my mind right now. I need a good laugh today, care to take the challenge?? Help! ( Did I mention I'm out of RUM ?)

I'm graphically challenged take two!

As you know from yesterdays.. "I'm graphically challenged" post, I had blood coming out my ears trying to create a background. I ended up making a half-assed pink background, which my MUCH TOO KIND blogging buddies commented was kinda cute and that they liked it. If you read yesterdays post you already know that I was bitching about not having a good program to work with. So today I ordered a program for shits and giggles.. it only cost me $29.00. The program is called PhotoMix and was really easy to use.

Here is my second attempt at making a background. As you can see it isn't as generic as the first try. Plus.. there's no blood coming out of my ears today!! Can you believe it?

Another thing I just noticed, my monitor is a 22".. if you have a small monitor, you won't be able to view my second attempt at making a background. It cuts the background out.. trial and error people!

I'm graphically challenged!

If you looked inside my head right now.. ya wanna know what you'd see?? A friggin' hamster running on a wheel. I was feeling bored this evening and thought I'd give my blog a little makeover. So I'm browsing the Internet looking for a site that has nice backgrounds and I came across a really great site called thecutestblogontheblock. As you can see I found a really cute background there, and with GREAT EASE made the changes.
Well.. being the pea-brain that I am, this is what I started to think...

My inner voice: "Hey.. that was easy, I'll bet it's SUPER EASY to make a background!" "You're bored, why don't you go ahead and give it a shot!"

So I proceed to follow the directions: "How to make your own background." The cutestblogontheblock gives directions on their site for doing this. I don't have any of the fancy photoshop software, so I do what the directions say to do, Download a program called Paint.NET.

Holy shit, what a can of worms I opened up. I am graphically retarded! I'm pissing around, and pissing around with this program for two hours! I managed to finally make a background. The problem is.. I clicked so many buttons, I have no idea how the hell I did it. So the moral of my story is....DON'T TRY AND MAKE A BACKGROUND IF YOU DON'T OWN ANY GOOD SOFTWARE! Just a little heads up for my blogging buddies before they do what I did and end up with blood coming out their ears from thinking too hard.


If you want to see the lame-ass background that took me TWO HOURS to create click here!

P.S. It's my blog test site... Better than screwing up my regular blog.

Life sucks and then you die!

I'm feeling really bummed out today. As winter draws to a close and spring is fast approaching most people are jumping for joy. Hell, everyone jumps for joy, right?? Why the hell can't I jump for joy too damnit!? Well I'll tell you why...
When spring hits, I HAVE TO GO BACK TO WORK! The engineering company that I currently work for called today.

My Boss: "Hey, how ya holding up??" "I just wanted to call and check up on you." "Are you anxious to get back to work?"

Me: "Awww shit!!" "Why the hell did I answer the phone??" "What the fuck was I thinking??" "Hey John, it's so good to hear from you." "Yeah.. I've been sooo bored sitting around the house, of course I'm anxious to get back to work!"

This bites the big one!!! The feeling that I got from him on the phone was that I'd be returning to work in March. I'm the only one around these parts that's praying for another 10 ft of snow to fall. I really enjoy being able to spend time with my children. Thinking of leaving them again really upsets me. I'm not being overly dramatic about this. I've been known to work a 17 hour day. Saturdays and Sundays are not off limits either. It's not like I have a choice in the matter, I have to do it. I need that money to provide for my family. It takes two people now-a-days to make a go of it.



I mean.. would you be anxious to get back to lookin' at THIS? My job is to inspect the construction of bridge work and roadway/interstates. But I think my job title should be "Crack inspector." I have to look at this shit day in and day out and pretend like I didn't see it! I think I've seen every shape, size, dimension, dirty, clean, hairy, hairless, bumpy, smooth, deformed, disgusting ass crack that ever popped its ugly head out.


The funny thing is, I've never encountered a crack like this. Huh.. Go figure. Is life trying to play a funny joke on me? If it is... It's NOT FUCKIN' FUNNY! I mean.. the work place could be so much more pleasant with a crack like that around. So much easier on the eyes, don't ya think? I could hear myself now... ummm, excuse me, those dimensions don't seem to be right. Could you remeasure that for me again? AND AGAIN? AND AGAIN? I'd have him bending over so much he'd probably end up with a friggin' hump on his back. Poor guy would end up looking like Quasimodo.


If the ugly ass cracks weren't enough, I have to try not to barf when confronted by the unkept bearded guys. NO NOOOO! If I have to suffer through this nightmare, you can at least hear me out. Don't try to click off my blog just because you barfed in your mouth a little. Toughen up! We are now going to discuss FROZEN SNOT, yes I said FROZEN SNOT! I have to look these guys in the face while feeling my stomach juices slowly eeking up my throat. Don't even think about going near them right after lunch. I've seen every food product imaginable stuck to the front of their faces! I really don't think you want me to get into the snuff dribblers. This is not a job for a weak stomach.


Then there's dealing with the infamous... Male Chauvinist!
Definition: a male who patronizes, disparages, or otherwise denigrates females in the belief that they are inferior to males and thus deserving of less than equal treatment or benefit.
I have gone through 7 long years of this shit. It gets very tiring to deal with this on a day to day basis. I've walked out onto job sites and been laughed at, cat called, and out right hated before even being spoken to. Some men don't take to kindly to having a woman directing their work. But that's OK, how do you think I learned to cuss like a sailor? You learn to toughen up real quick out there.
In all fairness, I have to mention the "nice guys." For every 1 male chauvinist pig, there are 30 really great guys. Respectful, fair, pleasant and not threatened at all by a woman. That's good, because as far as my job title goes. I'm usually the only woman there. It can be lonely... so it's a relief to have some nice people to talk to.


I guess I'll just have to suck it up and go back to my miserable existence at work. Unless I can come up with another means to bring home the bacon.

My husband ... the true romantic.

"Happy Valentines Day sweetheart, I bought these especially for you!"

""Whats that?" "This is a dinner you'll never forget?" "Have some more Chardonnay."

"Do you like what I've done with the bedroom? I knew you'd be surprised."

"I've been a dirty boy, get in here and lather me up."

"I bought something sexy to wear, you won't believe your eyes!"

"You bought me a little something too? " I can't believe you were able to find my size!"

OK, OK, So I embellished with the pictures a little, but for the most part it was all true, See for yourself.

"Happy Valentines Day sweetheart, I bought these especially for you!"

""Whats that?" "This is a dinner you'll never forget?" "Have some more Chardonnay."

"Do you like what I've done with the bedroom? I knew you'd be surprised."

"I've been a dirty boy, get in here and lather me up."

"I bought something sexy to wear, you won't believe your eyes!

"You bought me a little something too? " I can't believe you were able to find my size!"

To scoop or not to scoop, that is the question

To scoop or not to scoop, that is the question;
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous shit piles,
Or to take arms against a sea of dog turds,
And by opposing, end them.

I am having a REAL problem right now. This winter has been brutal around these parts. Tons of snow, -10 degree temperatures... which prevented me from being able to keep up on the pooper scooping front. Much to my dismay, we had a sudden heat wave... 40 + degrees for about a week now. So I got the bright idea, since the temperature went up, to go outside and clean the yard up a bit. Happily I skipped outside, not needing a coat, and feeling quite chipper..... until I looked down..

My happy outing turned into a nightmare. It seems as if every square foot of my yard is covered in SHIT! Frantic, I grab my scooper, and began the arduous task.

Scoop....

Walk to the bottom of the hill.....

Throw......

Walk back up the hill.....

Scoop......

Walk to the bottom of the hill.....

Throw.....

Walk back up the hill.....

After about 45 minutes of this I had to go inside and grab my inhaler because my asthma was acting up. Sheer exhaustion or shit fumes?? Who knows! A little bit of both I'd say.

I had no choice but to give up. I really didn't want my husband to have to dial 911.

Operator: "911, what is your emergency?"

My Husband: "My wife.. she's not breathing, she seems to have been overcome by shit fumes!"

Operator: Stay calm sir! What I need you to do is to roll her over onto her side."

My Husband: "OK, ummm wait, God damnit, I just stepped in a pile of shit! Hold on, hold on, I'm getting it. OK, she's on her side."

Until I start to feel better, the rest of the shit in the yard is going to have to wait. Actually, I think I have a better idea... I'm going to put THE DOGS to work SCOOPING THEIR OWN SHIT! Both of my dogs better thank the Lord that they weren't born with opposable thumbs.

This bitch session was brought to you by: THE DAILY GRIPE

Unwanted Visitor

UNWANTED VISITOR

While chilling out in my chateau,
I sat there sipping a warm cocoa.
Content & happy,
everything was rich.
But it all ended,
in walked the bitch!

Her mere presence caused me pain.
She Mocked...
She laughed...
at my sudden weight gain.

She dished out her insults,
like a true cutthroat.
"Your ass is as big as your uncles houseboat!"

I felt ill, from all the strain.
Oh no, Here it comes,
the dreaded migraine.

I begged...
I pleaded...
"Why won't you leave?"
She sneered...
feet planted...
I began to heave.

"How long will you be staying?" I said with a squeak.
"Will it be just like last month,
approximately one week?"

Handing out torture,
she was a true expert.
Before I knew it,
my tits started to hurt.

My mood changed...
My anxiety...
Now that was the worst.
Before I knew it,
I had an angry outburst.

My husband, the target,
I called him a slob.
I heard myself yelling...
"GO F*CK A CORNCOB!"

My children, poor things,
they were caught off guard.
They saw me hit the mailman,
while yelling "RETARD!"

It felt like forever,
would her visit ever end?
How could anyone like her,
or call her their "little friend?"

Finally it was over,
she bid me farewell.
She stopped to shakes hands,
with my bearded clam shell.

My family and I,
we were feeling gung-ho.
We yelled out the window,
"See you next month Aunt Flo!"

Don't look at me that way!! I never said I was good at writing
poetry!

BYE! BYE!

Who the hell comes up with this sh*t?

I'm fired up today and ready to go people. You better hold on to your seats because I'm about to let loose... so if you look up into the sky today and see a strange green mist hovering overhead, there's no need to fear. What you are experiencing is just the result of a "Need To Bitch Bubble" that was floating above my head earlier. Needless to say.. it burst.

Right now you are stuck with me.... So at least do me the courtesy of hearing me out.

Today I'm going to bitch about discuss a few products that make me ask the question... "Who the hell comes up with this shit?"

First on my list of stupid products is the infamous Snuggie.



The first time I saw this infomercial... My jaw dropped in shock, I was incapacitated and speechless. I sat quietly... staring at the television set in disbelief! As the infomercial came to an end. I turned... slowly... and uttered the words.."What the F*ck was that??"

Here are a couple of reasons why I think the snuggie is a bad idea: (As if I really need to explain why)

1. If you are an elderly gentleman, you could quite possibly end up looking like a deranged monk! Note the upper left hand corner of the picture.

2. If your family attended a sporting event wearing "The Snuggie" .. chances are you would be very grateful that it gave you that "hands free" advantage. You'd be needing it after a very angry anti-snuggie mob (that I gathered) started ripping that god-awful garment off your back.

3. You look like a f*cking idiot!!!! Note upper left, right, and lower left, right hand corners of the picture.

Second on my list of stupid products is the disgusting Ped Egg

Glorified cheese grater with added sandpaper attachment?? You be the judge.

On the up side... if you're running short on Parmesan cheese, no need to disappoint your dinner guests. I know something that could fit the bill in a pinch. Note the upper right hand corner of the picture.

Third on my list of stupid products (just because of the name) is PediPaws

I for one can't understand why they called the product PediPaws.

Tell me if I'm wrong... The product was made for your Pet....

Note the happy dog and the "what the hell are you looking at" cat in the upper left hand corner of the picture.

...and it was designed to file down the nail, so it wouldn't actually cut into your animal and damage the skin.. right??

Therefore.. the product should have been called the PetiFile.

Silence..

Silence..

Silence..

OOPS!!! I get it now, my bad.

Fourth on my list of stupid products... the HD Vision WrapAround sunglasses

These glasses were designed to fit right over your prescription glasses. The glasses have also been known to give the wearer special abilities... Such as heat sensing. When the wearer slides the glasses on, heat sensing pits located in front of the eyes are used to detect warm-blooded pedestrians. A blindfolded HD wearer can still strike a pedestrian accurately, and it's all due to the remarkable sensitivity of these HD WrapArounds.

YEAH RIGHT....

I hate to burst your bubble if you think you look good wearing these glasses

To the rest of the world... you really look like this!

So on that note.. I shall leave you, I am now feeling stress-free and that green mist that was hovering in the heavens will likely dissipate.

Until next time, don't ever be afraid to "get your bitch on!"

Two Reasons why I drank a rum and coke before noon

First reason

Second reason

The Fake Housewives Of Orange County

I'm usually a very quiet person, but this new daily gripe blog I've created is working out quite well for me!! How good can it get??? I get to rant and rave about anything that pisses me off!! Wooohooo!! I'm really enjoying this!! OK... enough babbling... it's time to get down to business.

Have any of you out in blogger land actually sat down and watched this show? I have, and let me tell ya...... I get so irritated with these women I'd like to shove their Gucci handbags where the sun don't shine. They have the most disgraceful set of human values that I have ever seen. I have watched these women value money over ANYTHING & EVERYTHING!! It is nuts to me. I've seen them make fun of ordinary people saying... "look how low class they are". I've seen them stab each other in the back continually. Whoever came up with the saying "with friends like these you don't need enemies" must have been thinking of them when they made it up. I've come up with a little exercise for the Orange County Housewives. The exercise goes as follows:

1. Take off that $3000.00 dress you're wearing

2. Wipe off all of that expensive make-up on your face

3. Stop getting your cosmetic Botox injections for a couple years

4. Stop dying your hair and remove those hair extensions

5. Take off the diamonds/gold jewelry dangling from your ears and neck

6. Remove your breast implants or whatever else you felt the need to implant into your body.

7. Remove those porcelain veneers from your teeth

8. Leave your cash, checkbook and credit cards behind

9. Walk out of your little bubble... yes, that means leave your mansion behind and the security of that little gated community

10. Now I want you to grab a mirror and tell me what you see


Somehow I still don't think they'd get it. Oh well, call me pessimistic if you want to. After watching them in action it is hard for me to feel otherwise.

Who gives a sh*t!

With all the problems going on in the world, I for one find it insane that Jessica Simpson's weight gain could make headlines. What friggin' idiots come up with this shit? Who the hell cares!!!! Currently there are people losing their jobs, losing their homes, freezing because they couldn't pay their electric bill on time, going hungry because they have to pick between getting their prescriptions filled or eating for the month, and the list goes on and on. I would love to see a picture of the douche bag that started all of this. This person probably looks like Quasimodo high stepping it out of the bell tower. I'm not even a fan of Jessica Simpson, but the mindless chatter that tends to makes headlines really pisses me off. If Jessica Simpson looks fat... then I better get off my ass and start filling that 7 million gallon tank. I'm late for my performance at Seaworld!

Nadya Suleman

All I can do is sit here shaking my head. Nadya, Nadya, Nadya... do you have any WORKING brain cells left in that head of yours??? I am really trying to listen to your explanation of motive as to why you decided bring eight more babies into the world when you already have six children to raise. She claims that she did this because she was an only child that felt isolated in a dysfunctional family. THAT IS NOT A GOOD EXPLANATION NADYA!! Before I go any further... Here is the interview that NBC had with Nadya Suleman. I'll continue my gripe after, so we are all on the same page here.

This is absolutely pathetic to me. She really believes that she will have enough money to raise these children????? SHE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO PAY FOR THE BIRTH OF THESE CHILDREN!! SHE COULDN'T CARE FOR THE SIX CHILDREN THAT SHE HAD AT HOME!!! IF SHE COULD WHY WAS SHE LIVING WITH HER PARENTS??? This woman is living in outer space. I love the part where she says.. when I go back to college and finish my degree I'll have enough money to raise them. Hahahahahahahaha!! That is a riot to me. Let's look at facts for a moment. I did a little study of my own using a special calculator that gives an estimate on the cost of raising a child. I left out the expense of college and it gave me a grand total of $136,224. Hmmmmm, what is that x 8?? It came to a whopping grand total of $1,089,792. Plus, don't forget the woman has six more children at home. This calculator was not even a good estimate to the costs that she will face. How many of us have to buy a BUS to drive our children around in???? <---- added cost! These children will need to be seen by a doctor a lot more because they will most likely have special needs. <---- added cost! The doctors and staff that were needed just for the birth will likely be in the millions. <----added cost! If she goes back to college like she says she's going to... what about the daycare??? <---- added cost! I could go on and on, but I think just listening to this idiots reasoning is enough! I feel bad for her children. She claims she will be there for her children, I tend to disagree. If she had a job and worked from 7:00am - 3:30pm, just an eight hour a day job, and wanted to spend an hour a day with each of her individual children, she wouldn't be done until 5:30 am the next morning. GUESS YOU WON'T BE GETTING MUCH SLEEP NADYA!!